Fifteen Chapters.
One Truth.
A rubber band ball begins with a single strand. So does every burden you carry. The Rubber Band Ball is the story of how to set it down.
A Metaphor That
Changes Everything
Each rubber band represents something we carry — shame, comparison, sin, wounds, unforgiveness. The ball grows when we add to it and call it identity. When we try to carry it alone instead of surrendering it to the One who was designed to take it.
The Atonement of Jesus Christ was not designed as a reward for good behavior. It was designed for exactly the weight you are holding right now. This book shows you how to actually let go — through a five-step process that takes about thirty minutes and a red pen. Written by Ronald Howard, a storyteller, father, and former Bishop.
"You did not choose to build it. But you do not have to carry it forever."
The Rubber Band Ball
The Journey
You Are Not the Ball
The core metaphor introduced. What is the ball? What are the bands? And why do we keep picking it up?
The Bands We Wind
How shame, guilt, comparison, and performance-based identity become the rubber bands that circle us.
The Weight of What We Did
Confronting our own choices with honesty and without self-destruction.
The Weight of What Was Done to Us
Carrying wounds we did not choose, and why forgiveness is not the same as approval.
The Performance-Based Identity
The danger of measuring worthiness by behavior instead of being.
Comparison Is a Rubber Band
How looking sideways keeps us from looking up.
The Red Pen
An introduction to the central tool: writing over the lie with the truth in red ink.
Surrender
What it actually means to "give it to God" — and why most of us never fully do.
The Young Single Adult
A chapter written for the generation carrying the heaviest balls in silence.
The Atonement Is Big Enough
The central theological claim: His grace is not a reward. It is a gift.
Walking Forward Clean
What life looks like after the rubber bands have been surrendered.
The List
How to take inventory of everything you are carrying, one band at a time.
Leading Without Carrying Everyone
For the bishops, parents, and leaders who carry everyone else's ball.
The People We Carry
Navigating relationships where the other person won't surrender their ball.
One Band at a Time
A closing call to begin. Not to be perfect. Just to begin.
Choose How You Read
$13.95
A physical book in your hands
Ron believes this message should reach everyone who needs it. The digital and audio editions are always free.
You Are Not
The Ball.
Fifteen chapters to prove it.
Frequently Asked Questions
How many chapters does The Rubber Band Ball have? +
Fifteen chapters. Each one addresses a different type of burden — from shame and comparison to performance-based identity and the specific challenges faced by leaders. The book is designed to be read in order, though many readers return to individual chapters that speak to their current situation. See what readers say about the experience.
What is the central message of the book? +
You are not the ball. The rubber band ball is a metaphor for the accumulated weight of shame, guilt, and false identity that people carry. The Atonement of Jesus Christ makes it possible to set that weight down — not just be forgiven for what formed it, but to release the identity it created.
Is this an faith-based book? +
Yes. It is written from a faith-based perspective and references scripture, doctrine, and culture throughout. While the restored gospel is central to the message, the themes of shame, guilt, and identity are universal — and many readers outside the Christian faith have found it deeply relevant.
How long does it take to read? +
Most readers finish it in two to four sittings. At approximately 220 pages, written in a direct and conversational style, many readers have finished it in a single sitting. The Five Surrenders process outlined at the end takes about 30 minutes. Free worksheets to guide you through it are available as well.
Can I use this book in a group setting? +
Yes. It's frequently used in ward book clubs, Relief Society settings, youth groups, and leadership training. A free Leader's Guide is available for groups. Bulk orders can be arranged through the contact page.
Is the book really free? +
The complete digital and audio editions are free — no email required, no strings attached. Ron believes this message should reach everyone who needs it. Download both at therubberbandball.com/resources. The print edition is $13.95.